General Business: It has been a week that has reminded me of many social issues. First a friend and I were catching up, and she told me she had secretly married her boyfriend, who isn’t a legal resident of this country after moving here with his family when he was 12. Immigration and of course the presence of illegal aliens is a hot button issue, especially here where the border is only a few miles away. In the latter part of the week I attended a conference on “The Efficient Use of Water in the Urban Landscape.” It is an important issue, and as the person in charge of watering 40 acres of plants, something I have to make sure I do well, and not waste or pollute. Finally my parents and I took the kids to the New Mexico Farm and Ranch Museum today, and all the fears and dire predictions I hear about water and state of agriculture in this valley, statewide and even nationwide concern me greatly. I feel the need to start being proactive in my community, learning more about these issues and trying to influence what goes on in our government.

I suppose I will do this in my free time. : )

New Business: Today was a really great day. It started with me taking the boys out to the nursery so I could check in on my new hires. There were three hot air balloons floating by in the distance, as Z excitedly pointed them out, I thought to myself if we took a different route home we might catch them up close and personal. I am always overjoyed at the site of balloons against the clear blue skies on a crisp morning. Instead we got an up close and personal view as one floated right over us while we were at the nursery, low enough to wave at the pilot. Of course, Z was upset that I couldn’t hoist him up there to go for a ride. Then the train traveled by the nursery not once but twice, Z couldn’t have been more excited. The baby of course found the whole experience fun, but not as much as big brother. My parents come over for a visit, and we headed over the New Mexico Farm and Ranch Museum to ride the train there and because although we have attended events there, I have never actually toured the museum. It was rather enjoyable, but only maybe to us rural nerds, and they had some neat activities for the kids. It was nice to look at all the old chuckwagons and farm equipment and talk to my dad. The live milking demonstration was nearly missed because after hearing the ice cream is made from milk, that was all Z could think about. Good thing his Nonie (my mom) is a pushover because we had to leave promptly after the milking and go get some frozen custard from Caliches. (mmmm good!)

Old Business: We had dinner at a local restaurant, Texas Roadhouse for a friends birthday. (Does anyone else find it funny the TEX was burned out and the sign red AS(s) Roadhouse) They bring over a saddle make the birthday person mount it and everyone gets to yell YEEHAW. Man those Texans sure know how to party. Okay enough Texas bashing. They play good dancing music there, but don’t have a dance floor. I love old country music. Maybe it was the farm and ranch museum, or being the third floor ballroom of Corbett Center yesterday the site of many 4-H dances, but that music made me want to two-step and polka all night long. I was remembering a girl who used to love to spin in a cowboys arms at 4-H and FFA dances. Does anyone know where Martin Shaw is at? Man that cowboy could dance! You think if I put on Bob Wills and the Texas Playboys and move the coffee table I could get my husband to go for a spin?

Just a note: The two step, polka, cotton-eyed joe, waltz, schotze, or bunny hop and jitterbug are appropriate for country dancing. No self respecting cowboy, or farmer for that matter, that I know would line dance, unless you count the shotze, cotton eyed joe or bunny hop, but you still have your arms around each other. However if you want to kick it old school, you know how to do the schotze and bunny hop facing each other with just two people.

Three funny things.

1. On Friday night before my friends wedding we had a lingerie shower.  Her dad sent a gift wrapped in a trash bag.  Inside was a shoe box taped shut with duct tape.  Someone joked it must be footed pajamas.  Her mom said he looked but didn’t find them.  Instead he found a sweatshirt with Grumpy (of seven dwarves fame)  stating “I AM NOT IN THE MOOD.”  Priceless (and kinda sweet too)

2. My friend is very organized and so was her wedding (in  a good way.)  She was in total control, and wondered why people kept asking if she was nervous.  As we were getting our hair done we were discussing my sister’s wedding and how I hadn’t wanted to show her the flowers when they arrived because they were ugly and we just knew she was going to freak out. She is known for her outbursts, however my sister uncharacteristically shrugged and said “What can you expect when you change florists at the last minute?”  When I showed up at the church, she was taking care of the flowers.  I soon realized something wasn’t right, she was discussing the quantity of boutonnieres with the driver and he told her they were on another delivery truck.  No problem they should get there.  After he leaves she bursts into tears looking at the arrangements near the arch, “Those are the ugliest arrangements I have ever seen!”  I was flabbergasted because we have know each other since we were 10 and have never seen her cry over something like that.  I hugged her and said we would get it fixed, knowing that it was just nerves.  She said “I know it is stupid to cry over, and Marty didn’t even cry over hers.”  It’s okay sweetie, we all love you because you  are human!

3. As I was buttonning her dress, and having a hard time with those tiny loops and closely spaced buttons, the train bearer looked at me and said he could do that it was easy.  I said sure give it a try, you have little fingers, it might be easier for you.  “No, I am just skinny” he told me. 
 Well...... I’d like you note after he tried and failed he told me, “That looked a lot easier.” 

We had a great time.  I spent a whole night away from my babies, my mom came and picked them up for the night so I didn’t have to worry about them.  (The first time I have been away from both them!)  Hubby and I spent the night alone, I woke up refreshed, wow!  The wedding was beautiful and sweet and I am so happy for her, even if she married an okie ; )

I have been a bit melancholy over the last few days.  I have been very reflective thinking of my grandparents and their siblings.  I guess the upcoming holidays start me thinking about that.  This year I lost my one of my grandfathers and a few days later my husband’s father died. Since we have been married we have operated on a very strict schedule of Thanksgiving at one parents house and Christmas at the others and switched the next year.  This year Thanksgiving is with my family.  However Thanksgiving Day would have been my husband’s parents anniversary so we decided to spend it with his mom instead. 

I am okay with it but still torn a bit, I know it will be hard on my grandmother too.  My grandpa ( I called him PaPa pronounced Paw Paw)  loved Thanksgiving and had to have everything a certain way and he loved cooking the Turkey and dressing.  In the last few years we wanted to have a fried bird or one with special seasonings, but he wanted it his way, so that way it was.  In more recent years he wasn’t up to doing that by himself so when I was there I would go over and help him get it ready.  He would direct me and tell me what to do (even though I knew).  “Now crumble up that cornbread, add the celery and onion, and then we’ll get on the seasonin’s.”  He would always tell me to add a bit of Cayenne and then say “Now dammit, Nora , don’t add too much.”  He claimed everything I made was hot even if  I didn’t add any chile to it. “Nora did you make that salsa?”  Yes PaPa.  “Is it hot?”  I only added a couple of jalepenos, its not hot.  “That’s your scale, mines a bit different,” he’d say and gingerly take a bite grinning.

I should say that my like for hot food probably started with him.  He was probably slipping me fried pork skins with Louisiana Hot Sauce on it since I was a baby.  He was always snacking and I knew when I went to their house, we were going to eat good.  He could make some great BBQ out on his big grill, and often made brisket for parties and big events.  He could grill a mean steak too.  I knew I could always get away with asking for steak and eggs for breakfast, and he’d grill a good steak for breakfast.  We would watch Justin Wilson’s cooking show and later on be cooking and he’d add a little wine to the pot, and then had a little wine for the cook.  He loved that line.

I am the oldest grandchild and I could do no wrong in his eyes.  Seriously, I didn’t get in much trouble, which was in stark contrast to my other cousins, especially the boy only 3 weeks younger than me.  David was always in trouble, sometimes for doing the same thing as me.  I could stand up and to him and not get in trouble, so sometimes they’d send me to tell him something unpleasant.  (He never gets mad at  you....)  It wasn’t fair, and I hope I never took advantage of it. 

He took us camping a lot.  I remember them loading us up in the camper on Friday night and we’d go off for the weekend.  David and I thought it was great fun, we would be siting at the table in the camper, asking for our first cans of beans-n-weenies before we were out of town.  In the last few years for some reason he loved to tell me that every time I saw him, and story would get taller every time. 

He loved country music.  Not country and western so much, honky tonk was more his style.  Buck Owens, George Jones, Roger Miller, Oak Ridge Boys.  We would listen to Jerry Clower comedy tapes and laugh at his stories.  He also loved gospel, although he wasn’t a religious man by any stretch of the imagination.  I don’t think he ever went to church except to hear his grand daughters  sing.

He wasn’t a perfect man by any stretch of the imagination.  He loved food, women and wine.  My mom says that he would leave on Friday afternoon to get  a haircut and not come home till Sunday night when she was growing up.  It wasn’t easy for her and he was a rascal but everyone loved him anyway.  Probably my most unpleasant memories of him were the times I’d pick him up from the Elks club or the Moose after he’d been out drinking.  He would be sloppy drunk and I was always so embarrassed for both of us.

Yet we all felt loved, and if there was a time he didn’t want us around, I don’t recall knowing about it.  The last few years were hard, it was harder and harder for him to be nice and my grandmother bore the brunt of it.  He’d been through cancer treatments twice and was diabetic and had to give up all the foods he loved.  (Well he didn’t really entirely, but he tried.)  In short he was pretty miserable and I for one hated to see him that way.  My mom and my aunts would all fight with him about how he shouldn’t be eating this or that.  He was too stubborn and sometimes I wanted to tell them to leave him alone, let him eat what he wants and die happy.  If he hadn’t been so scared to die, I think he might have done just that.

So when he died in February, I wasn’t surprised or shocked.  In fact, while I was sorry to see him go, I was glad he was free to move on the next world.  My cousin and I sat on his bed looking through his cd player for songs to play at his funeral.  I looked at my cousin and said, “You know he’d be yelling at us right now for messing up his stuff.” My cousin looked at me and said, “No, he’d be yelling at me, even though I am just sitting here watching you. You never got in trouble.”  We laughed, because for all of his faults he was fun and loved us and was a colorful character who enriched our lives.